a visit from the ghost of christian past

I was enjoying a nice little slumber on a warm spring-like day...when all of a sudden there appeared a scary apparition. Dressed like bad memories of my childhood climbing under the pews of the community church, one appeared to me wanting to talk about life and faith and all things in between.

I realized quite quickly, however, there wasn't a lot of talking that this ghost of christian past wanted to do, as talking connotes a back and forth dialogue. No, this "holy" specter didn't really want a discussion but more of a monologue. Thus he began to talk...and talk...and talk. As he continued on, my mind began to fog over as verses flew in and out of his speech. As I would try to drop comments into the "conversation," I quickly realized that nothing I said was being heard as instead of listening, this apparitions mind was formulating it's next movement, it's next thought...sure to be peppered with scriptural reference (with no care for context...but alas...that is the old-school christian way) and "churchy" words.

I desperately wanted to escape this bad dream...for I knew that nothing would come of it. My heart and my mind cried out, "Away from me - thou dreaded spirit. Begone and return no more for I fear what you bring." Soon - though not soon enough - I bid this unholy specter a fond farewell - and made my way out of what had once been a potentially nice dream, but that had turned into a nightmare of epic proportions as this ghost from christian past invaded my senses.

And then...suddenly...he was gone. Will he return? I have my doubts. And I have my hopes that he won't...for the ghost of christian past is a very scary thing indeed.